Wednesday 18 June 2008

Bin there done that!

Cited as being Bin Laden's right hand man Abu Qutada is released from prison.

Apparently a leader of Al Qaeda and preached hate and incited terrorism via the net! Not just sending spam emails from the estate of Dr.Madu Frank,offering a share of millions.
Anyway he was found out and jailed but suprise suprise a judge(unlikely not resembling Cilla Black)released him on bail, stating there were no grounds ot keep him! Of course not.He hadn't unpaid council tax,or assaulted a burglar trying to rob him, no merely incited muslims to terrorize.
The Jordanians don't get him back(he is wanted on terror charges there too)so he is put under house arrest.Given a tag to wear-street cred with the cider drinking "yoof"- of today though,and must remain indoors for 22 hours a day.
Obviously MI5 are keeping tabs on him,and he unlike his tagged brethren cannot use his mobile phone or the internet.His Al Quada MSN buddies must be LOL-ing at these conditions.
But just when the war on terror(Copyright George Bush 2001)gets ever messier,a glorious chance to get one up on the Jihads is missed.Abu Qutada is forbidden from contacting Osma Bin Laden!!
Even in a cave in the depths of Afghanistan,this news must surely have raised a chuckle.No more late night texting,and that online multiplayer session of Gears of War is going to have to wait!

Tuesday 3 June 2008

Britain's Got Talent-really?

So Cowell's Got Cash finishes another series! A 14 year old boy who looks like someone plugged him in to the mains(hairstyle and dance actions)wins! Hmm..nothing to do with his cute appeal to 14 year old girls I suppose or his ever so sad life-told in slow motion and black and white with obligatory stirring music.

Still what were the chances of two Sikhs(Signature)meeting the Queen had they won? A black man winning something in Britain? Perish the thought. Ok so someone put the idea into Andy Abraham's head when he entered Eurovision; but even he must have known being British was enough to lose the contest.

So George Sampson meets the Queen and then..? What longevity of a career does spinning on your head get you?
Not exactly World Tour material,when you can walk through any shopping parade and see similiar for free.
Of the runners up Kate and Gin(girl and dancing dog) will inevitably do adverts,galas,pet food ads etc. Maybe somewhere along the way Kate will find a personality too.
Andrew Johnston(child opera singer)will be kicking himself-before the "school bullies" obligingly reciprocate-that his sob story wasn't quite good enough to win.Doubtful wether even Simon Cowell can see a money making opportunity from such a miserable git.
The one find in the competition is likely Faryl Smith-sort of Charlotte Church lite-12 years old and a line of Grannies everywhere must be waiting with what baited breath they have left for her to release a CD. Bizarre that she didn't win,maybe too obvious, what with Cowell's eyes rolling pound signs at her very mention.
Look on the bright side Visage didn't get through, TV remote "mute" buttons would have worn out in unison! A hint as heavy as her costumes for them to stop the singing and they carried on regardless.TV's loss is Grimsby Working Mens Club's gain.
Amanda Holden will be hoping Kleenex noticed her crying, and no doubt she will have her agent on speed dial.
Hyper Smash